Friday, 21 March 2014

Slightly Less Short Fridays: The Price Of Ham

"I'm sorry?" said Loretta.  "It's how much?"

"Three ninety nine, love."

"Three ninety nine?  For three slices of ham?"

"That's the price."

"Well I'm paying one pound sixty."

"And how do you come to that conclusion?"

"Well, it's only forty percent ham, so I'm only paying forty percent of the price."

"You can't do that, love."

"Look, it says in the ingredients: 'Powdered ham (40%)'.  And water.  One of the ingredients is water!  I'm not paying for the water.  I pay enough already to get it out of the tap at home."

"The water comes with the ham.  You wouldn't want dry ham, would you?"

"Well, maybe I would.  Take it out."

"I'm sorry?"

"The water.  I want you to take it out."

"Are you soft in the head?"

"No, but you will be by the time my fiancé's finished with you.  He's waiting in the car, and all it takes is one phone call..."

"Get out of my shop."

"Okay.  Sorry.  Can I take the ham?"


"Okay.  Bye Stan."

"Bye Loretta.  See you tomorrow."


Link of the Day: Newton's Cradle


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